Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
