I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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