if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize