Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
