grandma shit on top of the toilet
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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