Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
