It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
