It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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