on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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