i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize
