so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
