she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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