I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize