I wannas sexs uuuuu
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Couch. On fire.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
