I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
