Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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