living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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