they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
