Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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