I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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