i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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