She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
