no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize