i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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