dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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