ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself