I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
