That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
