She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize
