Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
