tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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