The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
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