she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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