its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
