How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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