She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
