There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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