i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
