I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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