Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
