I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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