saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
