all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
