In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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