i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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