Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
