There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
the day after is always just damage control
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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