every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
