I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Your cock deserves a montage
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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