I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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