All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize
