id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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